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What Would You Do?

3/24/2015

6 Comments

 
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Let me ask you a question.  How would you react if you discovered a trusted relative was sexually abusing a child in your family?  Or maybe the abuser is a highly respected, influential person in an organization you support.  Would you be outraged?  Or would you worry about what people think about your family or that organization? 

Unfortunately, when most people have the opportunity to protect a child’s wellbeing in a sexually abusive situation, they choose to preserve the reputation of the family or organization rather than coming to the aid of the child.  They choose to do nothing. 

I’ve been teaching about CSA for over a decade, and I’ve seen this response too often.  Just look at the media.  The Penn State incident is a perfect example.

Sad, isn’t it?  But true.

I know what you’re thinking.  You would be the exception, wouldn’t you?  You’d react differently by speaking up for the child. 

But what you don’t realize is you can’t do that effectively until you’ve been educated about child sexual abuse.  You’d need to know the facts, as well as the warning signs and how to prevent CSA from happening. 

You may think you already know enough.  You don’t.  Unless you’ve attended a CSA seminar or presentation, you don’t have the skills necessary to help a child in a sexually abusive situation.

Concerned adults need to be educated about CSA.  It’s important to learn how offenders groom parents before they go after their kids.  That’s the only way you’ll know how to act in the best interests of the child. 

Fortunately, there are caring people like you, who recognize the need for education and preparation.  You realize it’s more important to protect the child than the reputation of the family or organization.  When you learn how often CSA occurs, you’ll create a safety plan to protect your kids, as well.

Once people are educated about CSA and how it fuels a toxic cycle of abuse generation after generation, they’ll understand there aren’t several choices in this kind of situation.  There’s only one.  And doing nothing is not the answer.

********

If you’re interested in learning more about CSA, I teach educational webinars and presentations for concerned adults, parents, and teens.  I also offer private coaching sessions by phone or skype for child sexual abuse survivors.  You’ll find more information about these services at: http://www.educate4change.com/services.html  


Are you on my email list?  If you’d like to receive my empowering monthly newsletter and an email with a link to my weekly blog post, click here: http://www.educate4change.com/

 

6 Comments
Janele link
3/25/2015 12:22:38 pm

My uncle raped me and my little and big sister from the time I was six to 17 when I tried to tell them when I was younger they told me he was just joking around. Then when I told again when i was 17 our whole family disowned me and my sisters except our parents and brothers. He was never put in jail. My other cousin lied and said her dad raped her because she didn't want to live with them anymore and even though she confessed to lying he's still in jail. Different uncles.

Reply
Svava
3/27/2015 01:37:54 pm

Dear Janele, I am very sorry this happened to you and your sister. You are not alone. I was not believed the first time I told and had to cut my family out of my life for many years while I was healing. I hope you have found a place for support, validation and healing. Thank you for your comment and connecting with me on my blog. Let me know if I can support you in any way.

Reply
Lianne Soller link
3/26/2015 10:28:30 pm

We need people like you in the world, Svava. I remember the first time hearing a girl in school tell me that her dad raped her. I had never even heard of rape. It was scary to me to think that her own father could do that to her. It definitely shaped her in a negative way and I think the effects are still being felt today in her life. It's so sad. Thank you for helping empower people to do the right thing.

Reply
Svava
3/27/2015 01:40:39 pm

Thank you Lianne for your comment. I am happy to do what I can to create awareness and hopefully help others know that we can heal after abuse and trauma. Yes, the impact is devastating until we find the support we need to recover and restore. I do hope this girl finds the support she needs, and to know she is not alone.

Reply
Susan Friesen link
3/27/2015 01:30:24 am

Your post saddens me that this is indeed the harsh reality of CSA. It's sad that in general, human nature tends to ignore and hope someone else will help, rather than putting themselves 'out there' at the risk of being discredited. I heard a guest speaker at an event recently where the woman was beaten and raped by her husband. Everyone knew about it but no one dared shame the family over it. Thankfully she found the courage to escape and is now on a mission to educate others just as you are doing. Thank you for making this part of your mission as well.

Reply
Svava
3/27/2015 01:43:19 pm

Thank you for for your comment Susan. Yes it is sad that we live in a culture that does not speak up for victims because of fear of overstepping some invisible boundaries. I know so many survivors that are doing exactly that, taking their power back and using the experience to educate and help others.

Reply



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Svava Brooks
Educate4Change
Dedicated to Ending the Cycle of Child Sexual Abuse
Ph: 619-889-6366  
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