Educate4Change
Link to Svava
  • Home
  • For Parents & Caregivers
  • Adult Survivors Support Groups
  • Testimonies
  • Services
    • TRE® Iceland
    • TRE®
    • Products
    • Journey to the Heart Summit
    • Summit
  • Blog

Connecting to Your Body By Practicing Mindfulness

11/27/2017

2 Comments

 
Picture
The practice of mindfulness, such as meditation, can be a challenge for trauma survivors.   Trauma disconnects you from your body in the moment to survive a perceived threat. Most survivors do not get the support they need to heal and process the abuse they suffered, which leads to chronic inner tension and toxic negative believes that feed unhealthy behaviors and feelings about themselves. We think we are bad, we feel bad, and believe the abuse was our fault. 

The thought of reconnecting with their bodies, where all the bad lives, feels very overwhelming in the beginning. Active mindfulness, of the body and mind, is a very helpful practice because it teaches us to become aware of body sensations, thoughts, and emotions and to relate to them with an open, nonjudgmental attitude. 

I remember feeling overwhelmed when I began to connect to the place where all the bad was hiding. The shame that lived inside my body was toxic. I had mastered denial about my past and was hiding behind the "little miss perfect" act, and working three jobs as a young woman. I have memories waking up in the middle of the night and feeling the terror and worry creep into my mind, my body slowly tensing up until I disconnected from it completely, not thinking about or feeling any of it. But eventually I could not pretend any longer. I was struggling with growing depression and physical pain that showed up in regular painful migraines and stomach cramps. 

Then I started my healing journey.  I was fortunate that I found a support group early on in my healing. Within this group, I learned about the impact of my past and how important it was to feel my feelings. I learned from watching other participants. I slowly connected to my feelings about what had been done to me. It took time and eventually, mindfulness and meditation became important tools that I utilized on my journey, for over 20 years. Now it is a part of my daily self-care practice. 

If you are new to mindfulness, it is defined as “the awareness that emerges through paying attention on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally to the unfolding of experience moment by moment” (Kabat-Zinn, 2003 p. 145).

Research has consistently shown that mindfulness is an important predictor of well-being. People that meditate are more positive, feel more independent, and have higher self esteem and vitality. 

The other wonderful thing about mindfulness, is that it is already part of what being human is, a tool available to all humans. Anyone can practice mindfulness and you don't need anything outside of yourself to do it, even though it is helpful to follow a guide in the beginning in form of a book, course, or a coach. 

For some, mindfulness is easier to practice than meditation because you don't have to sit in silence in order to practice mindfulness. There are a range of different practices that I want to share with you in a future blog post but I also wanted to let you know that I am working on a 8 week mindfulness course that I will be offering in the new year. It will include a weekly webinar, a daily journal, and self guided mindfulness and meditation practices. This program is based on positive psychology and I know many of my clients will benefit from it.  

You can benefit from it as well. I lead my clients through body awareness exercises that help trauma survivors to learn to trust themselves and their bodies and gives them a practice that helps with self regulation and resilience during the healing journey. 
​

If you are interested in learning more about mindfulness, my upcoming group program, or have a question, please let me know. You can reply or comment below.

                                                                              ********

Do you struggle with body awareness? Not sure where to start?  Don’t worry.  I can help!  Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100).  Let me help you with the next step to heal your life.  Reserve your spot NOW! 

Have you read my bestselling book, “Journey to the Heart”?  If you’re ready to heal from the effects of abuse or trauma (depression, anxiety, PTSD, allergies, chronic pain, etc.), this book is for YOU!!  You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link).  Enjoy and happy reading!


Are you on my email list?  Email list subscribers receive an email with a link to my weekly blog post and occasional special offers.  If you’d like to subscribe, click here: http://www.educate4change.com/

2 Comments

How Being Grateful All Year Long Will Make You a Happier Person

11/22/2017

0 Comments

 
Picture
I have been slowing down a bit this week in preparation for Thanksgiving. I have family visiting and my son is out on school break. This last weekend I got out some decorations and put out some nice linen on our dining room table. I love the holiday season.

The upcoming holidays made me reflect on an interesting shift that happened a few years ago, when I realized that when I was in my control mode and things had to be just so, I put my traditions above connection and fun. I was terribly stressed out and making everyone miserable. The truth is - I was exhausted through most of the season. 

Isn't it interesting that during the time of year that is dedicated to love, peace, and the harmony of family gatherings, that most of us feel more stressed out, chasing a long list of expectations with a never ending "to do" list before the holidays. 

Once I changed this mindset and brought peace and calm into how I handled the holiday season, I felt happier and I know my family is just as happy. 

Another thing that I am putting more time and effort into is being grateful, not just around the holidays, but counting my blessings, each and every day. 

In the car yesterday, I was reminded by how mainstream the idea of learning to be grateful has become. There was a whole hour on the radio where the host asked expert researchers about the importance of gratitude and what it does for people and callers shared the one thing they were grateful for from 2017. 

So as this year is coming to a close, keep this question in mind: What is the number one thing that you are grateful for from this past year? I would love to hear your answer!

The practice of gratitude forces us to be more aware and mindful of the moment. It requires us to reflect and recall something positive and bring your awareness into your body, how you thought and felt about it in the moment. How did you feel about a hug from a loved one, the beautiful sunset, the warm water on your skin in the shower, the chocolate cake your partner made for you, the smile on your childs face when you took an extra moment to encourage him, the purring cat on your lap...All of these are examples of things are only felt and acknowledged in the moment.

Because of our hardwiring, it is easier to be negative than positive. It takes time and effort to shift our mindset and we do that by focusing and starting to look for the good things in our life. I know there have been times where that was hard but, no matter what, most of us can find something good, no matter how small or insignificant it might seem at first. This is a very powerful practice and over time is how you create new positive feelings and healthy habits. 

Something especially helpful if you are going through a hard time is to write a list every day, of 5 things you are grateful for in you life and spend the day reflecting on it.

Right now, I am feeling grateful for my family, the season, the colorful leaves on the trees, my friends, and the trips I have taken this year, and you, my friend. If you are reading this, I want you to know that I appreciate you - more than you will ever know.  

But the one thing I am most grateful for this year is the time I have spent in nature. I rediscovered that nature was and has always been my sanctuary. I feel so blessed by the strong connection I feel that helps to ground me in my body and gives me access to something much greater than myself. 

I would love to hear from you all, whether it's about practices of gratitude or mindfulness that you use or the thing you are most grateful for over the last year. Don't be afraid to reach out and start a conversation with me about your answer!

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!


                                                                             ********

Do you struggle with mindfulness? Not sure how to start a mindfulness practice?  Don’t worry.  I can help!  Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100).  Let me help you with the next step to heal your life.  Reserve your spot NOW! 

Have you read my bestselling book, “Journey to the Heart”?  If you’re ready to heal from the effects of abuse or trauma (depression, anxiety, PTSD, allergies, chronic pain, etc.), this book is for YOU!!  You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link).  Enjoy and happy reading!


Are you on my email list?  Email list subscribers receive an email with a link to my weekly blog post and occasional special offers.  If you’d like to subscribe, click here: http://www.educate4change.com/

0 Comments

The 6 Stages of Starting Positive, Healthy Habits

11/13/2017

0 Comments

 
Picture
One of my greatest passions is learning new things. I am always bookmarking pages, with a list of books I want to read and courses to explore. I know this passion has served me well and has been very helpful on the healing journey. But it can also be distracting or something we use to keep us distracted. Have you ever noticed that? 

What I have learned from experience is to focus only on integrating or changing one habit at a time and only signing up for one program at a time. Humans have great intention but the truth is, we all struggle with change and find ourselves resisting it in the beginning.

I am attending a weekly class on resilience right now because I am interested in deepening my understanding, for myself and my clients, of how to better navigate how our bodies respond during stress and how to bring ourselves back to balance. It is such an important skill to learn, especially for survivors of trauma. 

The interesting part of learning about change is that even when it is good for you and the thing you KNOW you want, you still have to go through the stages of behavior change.  So I appreciated the reminder in my class and have the feeling that a few of you could use a reminder also. 

There are six stages we all go through to change our behavior and to create new habits. They are: 

1. Not ready. You may not even be aware that something needs changing or have any interest in making a change. This could also be because you don't have the information you need to feel safe about how to change. 

2. Getting ready. You may have awareness around something needing changing and even feel that you are setting intention to change, or have been thinking about it, but still not sure exactly when to start.  

3. Ready. Your intention is to make a change and you have taken some steps towards that change.
 
4. Action. You are actively working on this change and have been for about six months. 

5. Maintenance. You have created a new habit and it has become part of your routine. You recognize the possibility of relapse and are actively aware to prevent it. 

6. Relapse. Relapse happens. It is part of the process. The key is to not stop there. You make sure you go to the earlier stage and keep going. 

It was great to have a dialog about these stages in my class and to also reflect on the fact that the things that I have changed took me about 12 months or more to change.

This year my goal was to meditate consistently. To help me with this goal, I signed up for a 30 day mediation challenge. It was a wonderful way to start. For about 5 months, I meditated every single day. Then I was traveling for a few weeks and I did miss a few days. I noticed that the days I did meditate, I felt more grounded and centered.  When I got back, I found my way back to the routine that works very well for me, which includes my daily meditation practice. I missed my routine and felt happy to be in it once more.

The key was  to not to be hard on myself. To notice my inner critic when I did not keep up with my goal, to stop the old critical voice of, "see you will never be able to change,"  and use my self compassion practice to talk to myself the same way that I support my friends and my clients. 

Judging yourself does not help. Learn to understand the 6 stages and remember to practice self compassion. Make it a long term goal, a 1 or 2 year goal. Set yourself up for success but always keep in mind that we are more likely to relapse or stop doing the new behavior, no matter how good it it for us, if we are not actively being mindful about it. 


                                                                               ********

Do you struggle with change? Not sure how to create a long term plan for your healing?  Don’t worry.  I can help!  Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100).  Let me help you heal your life.  Reserve your spot NOW! 

Have you read my bestselling book, “Journey to the Heart”?  If you’re ready to heal from the effects of abuse or trauma (depression, anxiety, PTSD, allergies, chronic pain, etc.), this book is for YOU!!  You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link).  Enjoy and happy reading!


Are you on my email list?  Email list subscribers receive an email with a link to my weekly blog post and occasional special offers.  If you’d like to subscribe, click here: http://www.educate4change.com/
0 Comments

Self-Care Is a Vital Part of the Healing Journey

11/6/2017

4 Comments

 
Picture
Focusing on your health is important as you heal after trauma.

I had learned a lot about trauma. I understood the impact but having been fortunate with a healthy body, the long term impact had not showed up in my biology except for very painful migraine headaches and depression. But the toxic level of stress I had lived with my whole life had not registered yet.

Back then, my self-care mostly consisted of numbing the pain. It just hurt too much to think about it. I was in too much pain and too ashamed of what had happened to me. In the process, I had completely disconnected from myself and my needs. This strategy worked, and it worked for a while.

Adding self-care to my life was difficult because I couldn’t figure out what I wanted and needed. I was really hard on myself about this, too. It was embarrassing. I was a grown woman, but I didn’t know how to care for myself in a loving way. I did not know what it looked and felt like to kindly take care of Svava. Does this sound like you?

However, I was very skilled at taking care of family and friends. I knew what they needed and I would go out of my way to make sure those needs were met. I always put them first, often at the expense of my own self-care. It was much easier to focus on other people.

Do you ignore your own needs and focus only on the needs of others? I’ve been there, I understand, and I’m here to tell you that you can start to change that.

Any change begins with awareness. Pay attention to what works, what doesn’t work, and what needs to be tweaked in your life. 

The best way to do this is to make a list:
  • Are you even on your list?
  • What healthy foods did you eat this week?
  • Did you exercise or go for a walk?
  • How much water did you drink?
  • Did you do something today that gave you joy, something just for you, like reading a good book or getting a manicure or window shopping?
  • How many times did you meditate?

Seems like a tall order, doesn’t it? It did to me. With a busy work life and a family of five, I had no time in my day for taking care of “me.”

But I was determined to do this, so I kept trying. I knew I had to take daily loving action to changing my lifestyle, to make my self-care a priority, or I would never fully heal.

Then an amazing thing happened. I began to feel better about myself. I was shocked to discover self-care was helping me heal and it was making me healthier than I had ever been. I was probably even reversing some of the long term impact the abuse had on my body.

Slowly, I started to treat myself with the respect and love I deserved. The more self care I practiced, the stronger and more resilient I felt. It felt so good to finally know how to make myself healthy again. I was healing from the inside out.

You can do this too! Make today the day you take those first steps toward your own self-care. It won’t feel comfortable at first, but keep trying. You’ll be glad you did!

                                                                            ********

Is it hard for you to take time for yourself?  Do you struggle with the concept of loving self-care?  Don’t worry.  I can help!  Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100).  Let me help you heal your life.  Reserve your spot NOW!

Have you read my bestselling book, “Journey to the Heart”?  If you’re ready to heal from the effects of trauma (depression, anxiety, PTSD, allergies, chronic pain, etc.), this book is for YOU!!  You’ll find it at Amazon in Paperback (link) or Kindle (link).  Enjoy and happy reading!

Are you on my email list?  If you’d like to receive my empowering monthly newsletter and an email to my weekly blog post, go here: http://www.educate4change.com and register on the homepage or in the popup box.

4 Comments

    Archives

    June 2019
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    April 2014
    March 2014

    Categories

    All
    365 Day Guide To Thriving
    365-Day Guide To Thriving
    60 Minutes
    Abuse Survivor
    Abuse Survivor Coach
    ACE Study
    Anxiety
    Attachment
    Believe
    Betrayal Trauma
    Body Healing
    Boundaries
    Change
    Child Abuse
    Child Abuse Prevention Month
    Child Sexual Abuse
    Child Sexual Abuse Prevention
    Child Sexual Abuse Survivor
    Coaching
    Compassion
    Coping
    Courage
    Creativity
    Darkness To Light
    Depression
    Domestic Violence
    Doubt
    Eduction
    Emotional Abuse
    Emotional Healing
    Emotional Wellness
    Emotions
    Empowerment
    Evidence Based Prevention Programs
    Fear
    Feelings
    Goals
    God
    Gratitude
    Happy
    Healing
    Healing Guide
    Healthy Habits
    Healthy Lifestyle
    Hope
    Inner Child
    Inner Critic
    JourneytotheHeart
    Journey To The Heart
    Keynote Speaker
    Kindness
    Love
    Marriage Support
    Meditation
    #MeToo
    Mindfulness
    Narcissists
    Online Group
    Online Summit
    Oprah
    Overwhelm
    Parenting
    Peace
    Peer Support
    Perfectionism
    Personal Power
    Prevention Programs
    Programs For Adults
    PTSD
    Relationships
    Releasing Your Authentic Self
    Sabotage
    Safety
    Self Acceptance
    Self-acceptance
    Self Care
    Self Compassion
    Self-Compassion
    Self Help
    Self Love
    Self-love
    Self Regulation
    Self-regulation
    Sexual Assault
    Shame
    Social Activism
    Spirituality
    Stages Of Change
    Stress
    Superpower
    Support
    Support Group
    Survivor
    Tension Patterns
    Thriving
    Trauma
    Trauma Informed
    Trauma Informed Care
    Trauma Survivors
    TRE® (Trauma Release Exercises)
    Triggers
    Trust

    RSS Feed

Svava Brooks
Educate4Change
Dedicated to Ending the Cycle of Child Sexual Abuse
Ph: 619-889-6366  
email: svava@educate4change.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/educate4change
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/svavas
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/svavabrooks