I did a small group presentation last year with a group of survivors and when I mentioned this birthright, a young woman in the group started to cry and asked, "Why didn't anyone tell me?"
I could feel her pain. My words had stirred her heart. Her sadness, her aching heart and loneliness. With my hand on my heart, and as present and in my heart as I know how to be, I told her, "unfortunately, they don't know it either."
Humans learn the good and the bad from their caregivers. Kids watch their parents interactions, relationships, and how they are treated by others, especially from childhood. We watch how people take care of themselves. Then we take all this information and translate it into how we fit into this word and the family we grow up in. And for most children growing up, there was something missing. We know it, and because we don't know how to ask for it and no one is talking about it, we assume there is something wrong with us.
The sad part is that children that grow up with basic needs going unmet grow up with this constant nagging feeling that there is something missing but they don't know how to fix it, make it better, or make the hurt go away. We can't because we need to connect and it does not go away until we learn to connect with ourselves and the unmet needs that live inside of us. As we learn to meet those needs we are becoming the parent and the protectors that we needed when we were children.
Here is the thing to remember. Childhood is meant to be a safe place for children to navigate the truth of who they are and what important skills they need to master given the age and development to begin to build self-esteem and a sense of belonging. Most adults today did not get this from their parents. Their parents just did the best they could. Most of them did, I do believe that, but just did not know how to meet the deep needs of their children. This is not something people talked about or even understood.
The good news is that it is not too late. If you are reading this and feeling the nudge to learn how to nurture, accept, and validate your inner child, you can. I am re-playing a webinar on inner child work if you would like to learn more. Here is the (link) I also love to teach inner child work to my clients and am happy to show you if you need some guidance.
It is wonderful to see people slowly put together the pieces and learn the truth of who they are. You are not your hurt. To finally realize their true identity and who they are meant to be. That is when we find fulfillment in our relationships and in our work as we dare to go after our dreams, explore our passions and share our gifts with the world.
Are you ready to learn who you are? I would love to help. If you would like to learn how inner child work can help you, I am offering a free 30 min session to anyone that has not talked to me before and wants to explore how I work. Here is the link to my calendar. Don't wait, book it now!! Can't wait to hear from you.
Ready to tackle the impact of your trauma? Not sure where to start? Don’t worry. I can help! Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100). Let me help you with the next step to heal your life. Reserve your spot NOW!
Have you read my new book, “Releasing Your Authentic Self”? If you’re ready to do the deep, hard work of emotional healing, this book is for YOU!! You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link). Enjoy and happy reading!
Are you looking for more support? I have created a closed Facebook group for the readers of “Releasing Your Authentic Self” If you are ready to dig deep, and want to experience the daily support, encouragement from others like you. Follow this link to learn more: Releasing Your Authentic Self Support Group.