Now that January is here, you’ve probably had a chance to review your progress in 2017. I want to celebrate you for your commitment to your healing. I know it can feel like two steps forward and one step back sometimes. So don’t just focus on what you didn't accomplish. That's not important. The only thing that matters is what you did accomplish. I know you had several victories in 2017 and I hope you celebrated them. If not, do that now. You deserve it!
Did you set a healing goal for 2018?
It’s easy for abuse survivors to forget change is a growth process and part of healing is to learn to trust the process.
Survivors often ask me if there’s a way to speed up the healing process. The fact that the healing journey takes so long can be frustrating, I know. Especially when you’re exhausted from struggling with the aftereffects of child sexual abuse, it can feel hard to believe sometimes that you too can reach those goals. You’re ready to change. You’re ready to heal. And you want it NOW! But ups and downs are a part of it. Learn to appreciate the yearly goals you reach, as well as the bumps in the road along the way. Each one appeared to teach you an important lesson that will lead you to future success.
If you haven't had a chance to write down your goals for 2018, I encourage you to do that today. Asking and intending for good things to happen is the quickest way for them to manifest.
If there are too many and you feel overwhelmed, focus on just one thing. What is the most important goal you want to accomplish in 2018?
It can be anything. What I have learned over the years is that the good stuff, like incorporating a healthy habit or learning a new skill, develops slowly over time. That’s because good changes occur in stages.
Here’s what I mean. Change is initially a mental exercise, so the first stage is governed by willpower and excitement. In the second stage, you create a routine to support this new change, which helps you deal with emotional resistance. By the time you progress to the third stage, this new change has become a lifestyle or a new area of skill or strength. But that only happens after you confront and resolve each area of resistance you encounter in the second stage. You must look those fears in the eye, assure your inner child he/she is safe, and convince this child the new change is good, that he/she is is worthy of reaching that goal. Each one of us faces doubt and uncertainty on the way. Only then can you make peace with the resistance and work through it each time you set a new goal or are making changes.
There’s no way around it. This entire process takes time. I suggest to my clients to create a long term plan and focus on one thing for the year. It may not take you a whole year to reach the goal, but if you’ve decided to do something kind for yourself every day for self-care, it helps to create a plan to manifest it. Then it’s just a matter of working on your plan until it becomes a new habit.
You deserve everything GOOD in life. But it all starts with a goal, then a step by step plan, and then finding someone to support you along the way. Let 2018 be the year you manifest your most important goal. You can do this. Go for it! I hope you share it with us in the comments below. I believe in you.
Confused about setting a healing goal for 2018? Not sure where to start? Don’t worry. I can help! Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100). Let me help you with the next step to heal your life. Reserve your spot NOW!
Have you read my new book, “Releasing Your Authentic Self”? If you’re ready to do the deep, hard work of emotional healing, this book is for YOU!! You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link). Enjoy and happy reading!
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