Blog About Healing and Recovery after Child Sexual Abuse

Did You Know There’s Nothing Wrong With You?

6/12/2016

It’s true! How do I know? Because I’m just like you, and there’s nothing wrong with me.

In fact, I’m exactly like you. We’re both survivors of child abuse and trauma. Because we were hurt by people who were supposed to teach us about love and trust, we grew up trusting no one. Yes, in the past we tried to change. Many times. But no one believed in us, so why bother?

Survivors like us are trapped by trauma. It’s fueled by shame and fear. Trauma isolates, disconnects, and distorts.

Because of that, I’m writing this blog today just for YOU! My intent is to plant a seed of hope and healing in you. If you nurture and care for it, this seed will help you grow and blossom into the grounded, compassionate, trusting human being you were born to be.

Begin by connecting with your truth and allowing it to sink deep into your heart. This is your truth: there’s nothing wrong with you now, and there never has been.

When I reconnect with my truth, I’m able to love and accept every person on this planet. When I respect myself, I’m able to respect and honor you for who you are and what you’ve been through. When I learn to love myself, I’m able to fall in love with all of you.

Maybe you think there’s something wrong with you. Maybe that’s where you’re stuck, and you don’t know what to do next.

If you have kids, this is a good place to start. That’s what I did. I decided to heal for my kids, because I didn’t see the value in healing for myself.

Start where you are now in the place that makes the most sense to you. If you get stuck, don’t worry. Give me a call, and I’ll help you work through it.

Remember, there’s nothing wrong with you. There never was, and there never will be. You’re just like me. All you need is support, hope, and encouragement to find your way back home to yourself. And that’s the truth!

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Are you stuck on your healing journey? I can help you take that next step. Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me. My calendar is filling up fast, so don’t wait. Let me help you heal your life. Reserve your spot NOW!

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4 Comments

Kristina

6/17/2016 07:17:16 am

Love this hope ! Thank you, Svava !
I read that after trauma, and the PTDS one feels so wrong. I feel wrong/not only I do wrong/ because of the message my abusers gave me in childhood, and when somebody tells me "you are lazy", "you are stupid, you did not figure it out yet, healed yet...". Just last week, I stepped on my glasses by accident, and the feeling of wrongness arised (like I am such a mess up, I don´t even get it right with the glasses, it is an evidence for my entire being-wrongness, because also my mother and others treated me this way in my childhood). I was thankful for it -at least I caught these thoughts. I had a dream about a snake -constrictor killing me: it is my mind that is too much, making me wrong, making my coping mechanism wrong (before I even can catch them). If I could feel myself into the truth as you say that "there is nothing wrong with me and never has been", I could move with more ease through the sickness towards healing. It feels less heavier. :-) Much love

6/17/2016 07:35:16 am

I just remember, I wanted to add, not sure if anyone has experienced it. But I feel probably mostly wrong for the way I cope with the abuse: one of my last discovers is that I have coped with the maternal inscest/kind of erotical, emotional, hidden sexual enmeshing message from mother, her mother../. I give myself to her (I am available, listen to her stories, give her my support, my thoughts and, I couch her) in order to survive as fast as possible, to get rid of her as fast as possible. In order not to make her angry and be the recipient of her rage/abandonment, in order to protect myself from hurt.
On the other hand, I noticed that "I like it" (I like to give the support etc), and here comes the problem. I judge myself for this giving myself to my mother, and for liking it (in a way, having some joy to give my identity, my body, my emotions to my mother, my life instead of having my own and shake her abuse of me). I judge myself for being that "pervert", weak, stupid, uncapable, immoral person who cannot stand up for myself. I participate in the hidden erotical avances and I agree with the inscest, although I am 35 already.
The part of me being wrong is the most worst one. It stops me from figuring out what is happening, it stops every possible compassion for myself. I can run very fast in a PTDS flash, in some somatic symptoms.

Svava

6/17/2016 11:23:21 pm

Hi Kristina, I hear you and understand. The feeling of wrong is how we coped and also how we hoped as children we could do better, be better, if only... You are already moving into the truth that there is nothing wrong with you, your writing and awareness is a great indicator. We feel so wrong because the memories, energy, shame and impact is trapped in our bodies. Take your time, be ever so gentle with yourself, and don't judge why you still do what you need to do to stay connected to your mother. We are hardwired for the need to connect and belong. It is perfectly normal, and you will know when you are ready to make a different choice. It is not a bad choice at all, for now. I am glad you hear hope, that yes, moving towards the sickness, accepting it, and acknowledging it, sets you free from carrying it, hence you feel lighter. I talk about trying to befriend it. Understand how has kept you safe. Pushing it away, only makes it resist the change more. Keep writing - you are a great writer and I thank you for your courage and strength in your sharing. I am sending you much love and light.

6/24/2016 06:19:29 am

Thank you, Svava, so much !

Did You Know There’s Nothing Wrong With You?

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