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Will I Ever be Happy Again?

9/4/2017

2 Comments

 
Picture
My heart sings with happiness every day.  Why?  Because I focus on the things that make me happy and give me joy.  I do this on purpose.  It’s an intentional action.  Not something that just happens.

To be honest, feeling joyful isn’t easy for me.  I’m not one of those naturally happy people, who leaps out of bed every morning with a smile on her face.  For too many years, I was bound by shame and couldn’t imagine what it would be like to be happy or joyful.  I didn’t feel worthy of happiness.

Back then, I wanted everyone else to make me happy.  However, that’s not how happiness works, so I was always disappointed.  I expected things to go wrong, to be betrayed, abandoned, and ignored.  It took a long time to get to the happy, joyous place I’m at right now.

How did I do it?  Through the simple practice of self-care and self-love.  

The secret to happiness is to do at least one simple thing every day that makes you happy and gives you joy.  It can be anything, like playing with your cat or dog, reading an inspirational book or your Bible, working in your garden or at your favorite hobby, etc.  You choose.

Just doing this every day for as little as 30 minutes will shift your energy from sadness to joy.  That’s important, because survivors of child abuse tend to major on satisfying the needs of everyone else.  We work ourselves to exhaustion, making sure others are happy by placing their needs ahead of our own.

It’s no wonder we’re miserable and depressed.  Not only were we emotionally abandoned as abused children, but now we’ve abandoned ourselves as adults.

Stop doing that!  You’re just as worthy of happiness as any human being on this planet.  Start acting that way.  Put yourself at the top of your daily priority list.  Do all the simple things that give YOU joy.  Making yourself happy is your responsibility.  That’s the true path to happiness.

Your joyous transformation won’t happen overnight, but don’t give up.  Consistency is the key.  Keep working at it.  Eventually, your heart will sing with happiness every day, too.  You’ll see!
                                                          ********
Is happiness an elusive dream for you?  Is it impossible for you to feel joy?  If so, I can help!  Just follow (this link) or call 619-889-6366 to reserve a one-hour coaching session with me ($100 per hour).  Let me help you heal your life.  Reserve your spot TODAY!

Have you read my bestselling book, “Journey to the Heart”?  If you’re ready to heal from the effects of abuse or trauma (depression, anxiety, PTSD, allergies, chronic pain, etc.), this book is for YOU!!  You’ll find it at Amazon in paperback (link) or Kindle (link).  Enjoy and happy reading!

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2 Comments
Mel Hofmann link
9/5/2017 07:03:05 am

I understand this concept and it makes sense to me. I have spent a lot of years caring for others at the expense of myself. It often has seemed as if there was no choice since the needs of the other have been great (like in the case of a disabled partner).

I am curious about things that make me happy and that require action on the part of another person like selling my art for example. There is not much that gives me more joy than that. How do you make things happen that depend on the actions of another person? Obviously things like taking myself on a photography adventure or spending time with my dog are more under my control. Thank you.

Reply
Svava
9/29/2017 04:38:23 am

Dear Mel, Thank you for sharing and asking your question. It is a good one.

When we are doing things that require interaction from others we have to be willing to take the risk and ask for what we want, or put it out there, recognizing that we might get no or rejected. The key is not to take it personally.

I assume that making the art is what gives you joy and so getting to share it with others, is the bonus. If your seeking validation from others through your art and I am making up an example here: Only if someone buys my art am I (fill in the blank) enough. And that is where the joy comes from.

You want to get very clear about your intention or your core belief about selling your art. This could be true for any exchange. Like I used to tell myself that I am not happy until my husband tells me I am beautiful, or takes me out dancing.

I can ask him for the things that are important to me, but I no longer equate it with my happiness. I know what makes me happy, anything extra him and I do together, or he says and does for me, is a bonus.

Hope this makes sense and that my answer is in line with your question. It is a good one.

Thank you again.
Much Love,
Svava

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